The Tough Conversation: Weight-Loss

 "It's not about the weight...

I said this to a client once and got cursed out. 

Now mind you, I don't usually take it personally when people go off on me. Not that it happens often. (Thank goodness!)  But I know, for the most part, it has nothing to do with me. They are venting, so vent.  But weight, like religion and politics, is a very personal conversation. Most people avoid talking about it. Most people also don't want to hear your opinion.

 Talking about weight and weight management is my business. You might be asking yourself "Why would someone hire a Personal Trainer and then curse them out for talking about weight -loss?" Make it make sense. I will!

I know what it feels like to be overweight. Society is not kind to overweight people. Be it, family or strangers, folks feel they have the right to give unsolicited "advice" or say the cruelest things to overweight people. I have, throughout my lifetime, experienced both. 

So by the time some people get to me, their skin is really tender. They have heard the snide comments, felt the slights(real or not), and are fed up.  What to do? Our job. We talk about weight loss and weight gain and we don't back down from the tough conversation.

"To change your body you must first change your mind"

How many of us, as Trainers, have had to say this to a client? When you have gained weight, lost the weight, and then gained it all back(possibly double)you must come to grips that it will take more than exercise to fix the weight issue for good. I've been this person. And I would have continued to be that person if I hadn't asked myself these questions: 

1. What are you doing?

2. Are you serious about changing? 

3. How did you get here(overweight)...again!?

The questions I asked myself so long ago,  are the very same ones I ask clients who give me pushback. 

Why do they give pushback?

Because they thought exercise was the cure, the fixer, the end of all of their weight loss issues. When you tell them that is not how it works, you might get cursed out! In order for real change to happen, we must, every one of us, change our mindset. 

After the conversation, after the frustration and anger, how do you know if what you said to them really hit home? They might not say a word. Their actions speak for them. 

"Sometimes you don't realize the weight of something you've been carrying until you feel the weight of its release."

Personal Trainers are not therapists. Nor, should we ever pretend that we are. When we see that a client has needs that are out of our scope of practice, it is our duty to gently and respectfully, tell the client. Eating disorders, depression, and extremely low self-esteem are under the umbrella of psychiatry. Physical fitness is just one of the cogs in the wheel of overall wellness. 

Being a Personal Trainer means being honest, without being brutal. Requiring the client to be accountable to you and to themselves. The process can sometimes be arduous. But the overall journey is a beautiful thing to behold! Keep doing what you love...Wishing you love and peace. 

But mostly, peace.